Family Ties

I wanted to write about the state that I feel I am in when it comes to my family and the dynamics of how we are. Right now I am in love with the most wonderful and compassionate woman I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. She is my wife. My Joy, my warmth, my strength and my guide in times that I have lost my way. For more than a while now I have been avoiding my family and some of the distasteful ways that they treat each other.

Right now my aunt LoLo is going through a really hard time in her heart with one or more of our family members and that is causing her to change the good natured way that she usually is towards evey situation. Normally I could not wait to go to my aunts house for the fact that she always had some kind of educational or just plain ol' fun activity for me and my two brothers to engage in. That seems to no longer exsist in her, and if it does it is not on the surface as it was in the past.

Her home is in shambles and needs major repair. I think that the way that she is being treated as an afterthought by those who so called needed her the most in thier own situations is cruel and uncalled for. I was one of the those few that needed her help once and still had no way to make up for the money, hospitality, and down right friendship that she bestowed upon me. I made a vow that I would give her my eveything to help get her back into her home and see that she is taken care of as if she were my own mother. Though that is my mind set I do not feel that her other nephew feels the same way. He is the reason that she is in this mess and still does not have the respect that it takes not to smoke away the blessings that were given to him in front of the woman who basically has paid his bills. At one time this would have been the pot calling the kettle black but I am, I feel, wisser now. I pray that this gets better today.

I am going to help my cousin to work on the plumbing today. There will only be me and him there and I again pray that he gets serious about repaying the enormous debt that he owes; as I have. Smoking weed is something that I feel should be done in the privacy of your own home. I can not stand by and watch this happen to her any longer. I will have to let him know that things need to change not just for my aunt but also for me. For I have had and will always have a desire that runs deep for the Chronic. I choose to remove myself from situations that would tempt me to ruin the career that my wife has worked so hard to achieve.

Please GOD let ther be no misunderstanding and that I am not trying to be judgemental about things. I just need to be focussed on the things that really matter in my life. Keep my mind clear and refresh my memory on the procedures that I need to know to accomplish my goal. Provide for LoLo and her needs for she is truly one of your chosen angels sent her to enrich this family.

Amen.